So tonight at the Grammys on CBS, they're going to air a bunch of Lincoln MKS Car commercials. I usually wouldn't give a flying mating ritual about the Grammys, CBS, or Lincoln MKS Cars, but in this case I'll make an exception.
One of the Lincoln MKS commercials will be from a local Filipino filmmaker named Patricio Ginelsa. I don't know the guy, but my godsister actually does; she says hes kind of a geek. You might not know him, but you might know his work: he was an associate producer for that Filipino-American classic the Debut, he made the APL Song's Video, and he made Bebot. So the dude is major with Fil-Am stuff.
Patricio recently turned in a proposal as part of this Lincoln MKS young filmmakers contest. Patricio's proposal got into the semi-final stages. The proposal then turned into this music video selling the Lincoln MKS and promoting this song.
As it turns out, there a few more people involved in the video's production.
One of them is this female named Francine whom I know from way back in high school. She's good folks and talks to me on occasion about environmental justice stuff. She was a production coordinator.
The other is Bambu. A Filipino community rap star from Watts and the Native Guns and the organizing group Kabataan-Maka-Bayan.
So basically, the video is basically us on National TV. Although within the context of promoting a luxury product that may upset the environmentally-conscious sensibilities, I think I prefer to just see us out there winning contests and accomplishing stuff. Brings my network of peoples up.
So, 2 Steps to Supporting Their Cause:
1) Go to this website.
2) Vote "Patricio Ginelsa."
Really, really easy, it takes a nanosecond.
Afterward, if you feel it, go to kidheroes.net and see the making of that particular music video. Bambu is the Filipino-Cholo-looking guy who plays the Cupid agent alongside the white guy, and my friend Francine is at the end of the video in a bandana holding up a toast after shooting.
Saturday
From a "Non-Traditional" Student Mother
The first day of orientation to USC, I attended a seminar for “non-traditional” students defined primarily in terms older students, students with children, and married students. As I departed from the rest of the graduate students all in line to go to the same workshops, I departed from them walking alone into what was probably the smallest orientation I’ve been to all day with 10-13 graduate students...
I knew my experience as a “young” mother, graduate student, and professional worker would make my college experience a “little” different from other graduate students who did not bare the responsibilities of having a child and having to support a child. For the first time, I felt what it was like to be on the “other side” and experience graduate school with certain challenges.
Childcare. I went to an orientation for childcare at my institution to find out that childcare costs were $1800 per month, but wait, you get a subsidy for $800 per month.
Housing. I wanted to apply for family housing. However, costs still ranged from $800-$1300 per month with a few limited spots and all I remember hearing was “we don’t know how long the waiting list will be.”
Healthcare. I am fortunately covered through healthcare at my school and through wishful thinking, I asked my institution if they possibly had an affordable plan for students with children and the answer is “no.”
On top of everything else, I had to worry about the baring the costs of extended childcare, just so I can study later. My daily routine included going to school, going work, picking my child up, cooking for my child, taking him and bath, and putting him to sleep with a book. At about 10pm, I was able to study.
It’s hard enough to bare these responsibilities and it really is such a downer that the university that you go may not offer the aforementioned above. One must question how supportive universities are in general, because this applies across the university system.
What a supportive academic environment looks like is a university is one that:
1. Waives childcare cost.
2. Has guaranteed family housing or more spaces available for students with children.
3. Offers an affordable healthcare plan for students with children.
4. Offers more grants and scholarships for students with children.
These are basic needs that are not addressed and do not hold priority. Hence, I see how one may be adamant to continue higher education because they face real challenges that makes them choose one over the other-- Education or Family? A supportive academic environment would help students with families, not make it a challenge for them.
BUT there are ways and there are resources. With patience, knowledge and time, it’s about knowing and finding what’s out there. If you should ever question whether continuing higher education is worth it, it is. THERE IS HELP, maybe not from your particular academic institution, but THERE ARE RESOURCES. I work with immigrant parents and children and I could honestly say that my experiences and/or attempts to seek resources whether failed or succeed, I know where to direct them. My life experiences have been the most resourceful, first hand experience is powerful and beautiful thing. It’s one thing to read it, but to experience it is something that feel so different.
I’ve come to the conclusion that these issues are not met simply because there are not enough of us to voice the particular concerns. Whether it be at the transfer, undergraduate, or graduate student, our universities are in dyer need of a diversity to voice particular concerns.
Remember what you all represent. You bring something unique to the university. Embrace it, challenge it and make it your greatest strength.
Peace,
Aileen Malig
I knew my experience as a “young” mother, graduate student, and professional worker would make my college experience a “little” different from other graduate students who did not bare the responsibilities of having a child and having to support a child. For the first time, I felt what it was like to be on the “other side” and experience graduate school with certain challenges.
Childcare. I went to an orientation for childcare at my institution to find out that childcare costs were $1800 per month, but wait, you get a subsidy for $800 per month.
Housing. I wanted to apply for family housing. However, costs still ranged from $800-$1300 per month with a few limited spots and all I remember hearing was “we don’t know how long the waiting list will be.”
Healthcare. I am fortunately covered through healthcare at my school and through wishful thinking, I asked my institution if they possibly had an affordable plan for students with children and the answer is “no.”
On top of everything else, I had to worry about the baring the costs of extended childcare, just so I can study later. My daily routine included going to school, going work, picking my child up, cooking for my child, taking him and bath, and putting him to sleep with a book. At about 10pm, I was able to study.
It’s hard enough to bare these responsibilities and it really is such a downer that the university that you go may not offer the aforementioned above. One must question how supportive universities are in general, because this applies across the university system.
What a supportive academic environment looks like is a university is one that:
1. Waives childcare cost.
2. Has guaranteed family housing or more spaces available for students with children.
3. Offers an affordable healthcare plan for students with children.
4. Offers more grants and scholarships for students with children.
These are basic needs that are not addressed and do not hold priority. Hence, I see how one may be adamant to continue higher education because they face real challenges that makes them choose one over the other-- Education or Family? A supportive academic environment would help students with families, not make it a challenge for them.
BUT there are ways and there are resources. With patience, knowledge and time, it’s about knowing and finding what’s out there. If you should ever question whether continuing higher education is worth it, it is. THERE IS HELP, maybe not from your particular academic institution, but THERE ARE RESOURCES. I work with immigrant parents and children and I could honestly say that my experiences and/or attempts to seek resources whether failed or succeed, I know where to direct them. My life experiences have been the most resourceful, first hand experience is powerful and beautiful thing. It’s one thing to read it, but to experience it is something that feel so different.
I’ve come to the conclusion that these issues are not met simply because there are not enough of us to voice the particular concerns. Whether it be at the transfer, undergraduate, or graduate student, our universities are in dyer need of a diversity to voice particular concerns.
Remember what you all represent. You bring something unique to the university. Embrace it, challenge it and make it your greatest strength.
Peace,
Aileen Malig
Grad School Musings: USC Rules the World Around Me and Filipinos in Grad School in General
These days somehow its USC this and USC that.
My mom works at an elementary school near there.
I am more likely to go there when there's something happening, including this concert they had with that myspace phenomena Passion, and Bambu, this one-woman act show about multiracialism that my co-wager dragged me, to and the latest, a screening of the Linguist with much apologies to the Queen of El Monte.
Almost all the people I know in grad school somehow end up at USC, despite that place costing a bunch of money.
There are quite a few folks I know earning Master of Social Work like Aileen.
There are future nonprofiteers like this one dude who works where I work named Mike.
There is a Ph.D candidate like Chiara in Education who will be doing research on Pinays.
There is one other dude named George at the School of Communications, who helped named Historic Filipinotown, and is looking to bring his research project to the wider Fil-Am community.
Meanwhile at the UC's, all I know is one guy named Paolo in education, who incidentally was a Pilipino UCLA transfer student but not a PTSPer but nonetheless helped us out at PTSP.
I'm curious as to what that's driven by. You'd think by virtue of UC being the public school, they would have more of us. Are they just that more disengaged from the LA community? Do they have impossible standards?
But there's a world beyond USC and UCLA.
Thinking more broadly about peer Filipinos in grad school, in my collection of 460 friends not going to SC or LA, I could almost count the number of people on one hand, (that is assuming I'm not counting finger joints and what not and just the typical phalange digits with the Arabic base-10 system.) Here's whom I know:
-An Economics M.A.
-An Asian Am M.A. going Ph.D
-An English M.A.
-Two Law Students
-A Counseling M.A.
-Two TFA people
I'm also struck by the fact that no one in my circle (with the notable exception of a friend Char knows) at Private Creme-de-la-creme high school where 99% of the graduating class goes to 4-year universities, is even in grad school. Mind you, Creme-de-la-creme High has a garbageload of its students in Grad School, mostly a bunch of law students. But as far as my circle of Filipinos at Creme-de-la Creme goes, were still at nil.
Perhaps that's driven by us being cheap, practical-minded Filipinos.
My mom works at an elementary school near there.
I am more likely to go there when there's something happening, including this concert they had with that myspace phenomena Passion, and Bambu, this one-woman act show about multiracialism that my co-wager dragged me, to and the latest, a screening of the Linguist with much apologies to the Queen of El Monte.
Almost all the people I know in grad school somehow end up at USC, despite that place costing a bunch of money.
There are quite a few folks I know earning Master of Social Work like Aileen.
There are future nonprofiteers like this one dude who works where I work named Mike.
There is a Ph.D candidate like Chiara in Education who will be doing research on Pinays.
There is one other dude named George at the School of Communications, who helped named Historic Filipinotown, and is looking to bring his research project to the wider Fil-Am community.
Meanwhile at the UC's, all I know is one guy named Paolo in education, who incidentally was a Pilipino UCLA transfer student but not a PTSPer but nonetheless helped us out at PTSP.
I'm curious as to what that's driven by. You'd think by virtue of UC being the public school, they would have more of us. Are they just that more disengaged from the LA community? Do they have impossible standards?
But there's a world beyond USC and UCLA.
Thinking more broadly about peer Filipinos in grad school, in my collection of 460 friends not going to SC or LA, I could almost count the number of people on one hand, (that is assuming I'm not counting finger joints and what not and just the typical phalange digits with the Arabic base-10 system.) Here's whom I know:
-An Economics M.A.
-An Asian Am M.A. going Ph.D
-An English M.A.
-Two Law Students
-A Counseling M.A.
-Two TFA people
I'm also struck by the fact that no one in my circle (with the notable exception of a friend Char knows) at Private Creme-de-la-creme high school where 99% of the graduating class goes to 4-year universities, is even in grad school. Mind you, Creme-de-la-creme High has a garbageload of its students in Grad School, mostly a bunch of law students. But as far as my circle of Filipinos at Creme-de-la Creme goes, were still at nil.
Perhaps that's driven by us being cheap, practical-minded Filipinos.
Friday
Chula Vista to UCLA and back
This is attempt no. 2. My previous post was saved and then I erased it because I was quite informal on it and was being overly nostalgic.
My name is Ivan, PTSP alumni 2006 fall (History/English). I was formely a PTSP Bayanihan peer advisor (High School Specialist, 6 months), but a vacancy opened up for the Assistant Director. I officially took the position in November 2005, but before all that during the summer and the fall I think I was already unofficially filling that position.
In my first year at UCLA I went out to a few Samahang meetings and participated as a script writer for PCN, it was a learning experience. However, I didn't really feel in the right place. Aside from cultural performance, I wanted to get more involved with the Pilipino community on campus. Luckily I knew Theresa (through PCN) and JP (my SPEAR counselor). They coerced me into doing PTSP, jk.
I felt that working with transfer students was something I can do, because I remember how difficult it was for me to transfer. So I stepped up and became a peer advisor, then an Assistant Director. It wasn't easy handling internal direction for an outreach project, nor was it easy to relate the needs of the project to Executive Board. It was challenge to be apart of leadership, but it was an experience I am completely grateful for. So thanks goes out to JP and Theresa, for pulling me outta the weeds into student/community organizing.
Of course I cannot speak favorably about PTSP without mentioning the bonds that I have built from my time with the org. Of course it also did help that I lived on Kelton Ave in close (and I mean close) proximity to other PTSPers.
Being a few years out of UCLA, I now understand the opportunity that I had in front of me while I was there. I am currently a community organizer here in the San Diego area, mainly working out of Mira Mesa area (aka 'Manila Mesa'). Without putting down San Diego, I tip my hat off to Los Angeles for what they have. San Diego is in catch-up mode with respect to community organizing in the Pilipino community. We got a different flavor down here (as we should). Each city is different. I am happy that I can I apply what I learned here in my own community.
Currently I am apart of three organizations:
FAVE (Filipino/a Americans for Veterans Equity) - In FAVE we organize youth around the demand for recognition and benefits for Filipno Veterans and their families.
Anakbayan - Anakbayan is a youth organization oriented around social justice issues of Filipinos across the diaspora. Our concerns lie mainly with the National Democratic movement in the Philippines.
KAMP (Kuya Ate Mentorship Program) - KAMP is a collective of Filipino/a youth teaching Philippine History and Culture to High School students (most in Filipino language class), with the intent of establishing Filipino Studies as an elective.
The interesting thing is that my gateway into KAMP and the rest of the orgs I am apart of came from my connections with PTSP alumni. So I currently organize in the San Diego area with PTSP alumni Ana Bravo and Eugene Gambol.
Furthermore, KAMP intially takes it's cues from PEP (Pinoy Educational Partnerships) in SF State. PEP is ran by Professor Allyson Cubales. If I am not mistaken, she is one of PTSPs founding mothers. So imagine my surprise when I join up and I am doing the unity clap again and talking about doing "Sala Talks". Moreover, we base our methodology on Frierean Critical Pedagogy. In short, these connections matter.
If anybody has any questions about my orgs, please feel free to ask me.
In Solidarity,
Ivan
My name is Ivan, PTSP alumni 2006 fall (History/English). I was formely a PTSP Bayanihan peer advisor (High School Specialist, 6 months), but a vacancy opened up for the Assistant Director. I officially took the position in November 2005, but before all that during the summer and the fall I think I was already unofficially filling that position.
In my first year at UCLA I went out to a few Samahang meetings and participated as a script writer for PCN, it was a learning experience. However, I didn't really feel in the right place. Aside from cultural performance, I wanted to get more involved with the Pilipino community on campus. Luckily I knew Theresa (through PCN) and JP (my SPEAR counselor). They coerced me into doing PTSP, jk.
I felt that working with transfer students was something I can do, because I remember how difficult it was for me to transfer. So I stepped up and became a peer advisor, then an Assistant Director. It wasn't easy handling internal direction for an outreach project, nor was it easy to relate the needs of the project to Executive Board. It was challenge to be apart of leadership, but it was an experience I am completely grateful for. So thanks goes out to JP and Theresa, for pulling me outta the weeds into student/community organizing.
Of course I cannot speak favorably about PTSP without mentioning the bonds that I have built from my time with the org. Of course it also did help that I lived on Kelton Ave in close (and I mean close) proximity to other PTSPers.
Being a few years out of UCLA, I now understand the opportunity that I had in front of me while I was there. I am currently a community organizer here in the San Diego area, mainly working out of Mira Mesa area (aka 'Manila Mesa'). Without putting down San Diego, I tip my hat off to Los Angeles for what they have. San Diego is in catch-up mode with respect to community organizing in the Pilipino community. We got a different flavor down here (as we should). Each city is different. I am happy that I can I apply what I learned here in my own community.
Currently I am apart of three organizations:
FAVE (Filipino/a Americans for Veterans Equity) - In FAVE we organize youth around the demand for recognition and benefits for Filipno Veterans and their families.
Anakbayan - Anakbayan is a youth organization oriented around social justice issues of Filipinos across the diaspora. Our concerns lie mainly with the National Democratic movement in the Philippines.
KAMP (Kuya Ate Mentorship Program) - KAMP is a collective of Filipino/a youth teaching Philippine History and Culture to High School students (most in Filipino language class), with the intent of establishing Filipino Studies as an elective.
The interesting thing is that my gateway into KAMP and the rest of the orgs I am apart of came from my connections with PTSP alumni. So I currently organize in the San Diego area with PTSP alumni Ana Bravo and Eugene Gambol.
Furthermore, KAMP intially takes it's cues from PEP (Pinoy Educational Partnerships) in SF State. PEP is ran by Professor Allyson Cubales. If I am not mistaken, she is one of PTSPs founding mothers. So imagine my surprise when I join up and I am doing the unity clap again and talking about doing "Sala Talks". Moreover, we base our methodology on Frierean Critical Pedagogy. In short, these connections matter.
If anybody has any questions about my orgs, please feel free to ask me.
In Solidarity,
Ivan
Thursday
It All Falls Down
The summer before my first year on Executive Board, we had a meeting with SPACE and PREP. I think we were trying to discuss how we could all work together. PREP and SPACE were doing the outreach thing to high school students, and PTSP had plans of starting up Bayanihan. We were supposed to present what the "transfer experience" was like. At the time, I didnt really understand the significance of being a Pilipino/community college/transfer student, but at this meeting I began to understand my experience.
I have JP Bareng Schumacher to thank for that. He came up with a very unique, very relevant activity to help put the transfer experience into perspective. He played this song:
Listen to the first verse:
Man I promise, she's so self conscious/She has no idea what she's doing in college/That major that she majored in don't make no money/But she won't drop out, her parents will look at her funny/Now, tell me that ain't insecurrreThe concept of school seems so securrre/Sophmore three yearrrs aint picked a careerrr/She like fuck it, I'll just stay down herre and do hair/Cause that's enough money to buy her a few pairs of new Airs/Cause her baby daddy don't really careShe's so precious with the peer pressure/Couldn't afford a car so she named her daughter Alexus (a Lexus)/She had hair so long that it looked like weave/Then she cut it all off now she look like Eve/And she be dealing with some issues that you can't believe/Single black female addicted to retail and well
Doesn't it sound like a situation someone would be facing at the community college? "Sophmore 3 years ain't picked a career," "she has no idea what she doing in college," "won't drop out her parents'll look at her funny," and more. When I heard this I could relate. I didn't go through exactly the same thing, but a lot of the issues were similar.
I think we ended up labeling "All Falls Down" the "PTSP Song" for that year. I continued using this activity in future retreats, as I thought it seemed fitting and helped get across the issues PTSP looked to address. This activity was so relevant and effective for me, I implemented it into the Orientation program at the community college I worked at. It was an excellent way to engage new students and have them think about why they were going to college and obstacles they may face.
On that note, I think this would be an excellent activity to use at the focus groups that will be taking place next month. I will see if I can make it, and if so, I'm down to do this activity.
I have JP Bareng Schumacher to thank for that. He came up with a very unique, very relevant activity to help put the transfer experience into perspective. He played this song:
Listen to the first verse:
Man I promise, she's so self conscious/She has no idea what she's doing in college/That major that she majored in don't make no money/But she won't drop out, her parents will look at her funny/Now, tell me that ain't insecurrreThe concept of school seems so securrre/Sophmore three yearrrs aint picked a careerrr/She like fuck it, I'll just stay down herre and do hair/Cause that's enough money to buy her a few pairs of new Airs/Cause her baby daddy don't really careShe's so precious with the peer pressure/Couldn't afford a car so she named her daughter Alexus (a Lexus)/She had hair so long that it looked like weave/Then she cut it all off now she look like Eve/And she be dealing with some issues that you can't believe/Single black female addicted to retail and well
Doesn't it sound like a situation someone would be facing at the community college? "Sophmore 3 years ain't picked a career," "she has no idea what she doing in college," "won't drop out her parents'll look at her funny," and more. When I heard this I could relate. I didn't go through exactly the same thing, but a lot of the issues were similar.
I think we ended up labeling "All Falls Down" the "PTSP Song" for that year. I continued using this activity in future retreats, as I thought it seemed fitting and helped get across the issues PTSP looked to address. This activity was so relevant and effective for me, I implemented it into the Orientation program at the community college I worked at. It was an excellent way to engage new students and have them think about why they were going to college and obstacles they may face.
On that note, I think this would be an excellent activity to use at the focus groups that will be taking place next month. I will see if I can make it, and if so, I'm down to do this activity.
Tuesday
Being Pilipino/Filipino/Fil-Am Ain't Always Easy...Theresa's Intro
I guess since is my first entry in this blog, I should introduce myself. This could take forever, so I'll keep this short for now. =P
My PTSP stats include:
-Co-Founder AKA Mom of PTSP Bayanihan with JP
-PTSP Bayanihan's first official Director (and all the titles before Director)
-One of two of the first Alumni Advisors to PTSP (at least as far as I know)
-Co-author of the PTSP Bayanihan handbook (which I've still never seen the final version of, but -I bet probably needs some major revising), again with JP
All this is not to mention my many hats in Pilipino organizations and clubs and whatnot during my 2.5 years at UCLA, being that I am a transfer student. I graduated in 2005 to find myself pretty much unemployed, in debt, back at home, bored with life, car-less, newly-single--so pretty much in a terrible, terrible rut. Maybe this wasn't the best idea, but I thought med school (and more financial aid) would solve all these problems in one fantastic hit. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen...and I'm in my 3rd year, currently residing in Guadalajara, Mexico, to boot.
So I'm supposed to be studying, but I'll leave you with this story and question, and feel free to comment on this.
This weekend, I went to 2 super bowl parties. The first one, during the first half of the game, had tons of traditional football party food, drinks, yelling, and I was the only non-Mexican girl to boot, not to mention that there were only 5 girls there total. It was nice to be the only girl there that understood Futbol Americano as well. Anyway, that was one party. I went to another in the second half that was quite the opposite. It was quieter, less drinking, fast food, people studying in the other rooms, and I was literally the only person jumping around during plays and screaming at the TV. Perhaps one would think it was the 2 beers and tequila shot at the other party getting to me...but no. If you know me at all, you'll know that I'm like that during sports events as long as I feel I'm with people I'm comfortable with. After the game ended, we were just sitting around, sipping on beer and talking as people started to leave. About 2 more beers in, I couldn't drive anywhere just yet and stuck around.
Conversation went around...we were all joking around and such, when, to make a long story short, one of my friends started talking about race. I threw in my usual quip about myself: in Mexico, before I can say a word of my awful Spanish which completely lacks an accent, most people look at me and I am almost certain they think one of the following:
-She's Mexican.
-She's Asian...I think.
-I have no idea where this girl is from.
I swear most people think the third of the above the most often, as people constantly ask me where I'm from, especially after I talk. Usually I say California, but sometimes people ask for a more...in-depth answer. And some of those people have no idea where the Philippines is anyway, so I've just learned to let this go. This all is no longer weird to me, and that's where the story turns ugly.
You tell me--how would you respond to this statement:
Pilipinos are the Mexicans of Asian. Your last names are all Spanish like the Mexicans.
Perhaps fueled by the alcohol, I was pissed. My friend tried to play it off like we were all making fun of each other, that I was being too emotional in response to this, and that is was just 'cause I was drinking (by the way, I wasn't drunk either). He and my other friend walked off for a bit, and I stayed lying on the couch, trying not to explode. I left shortly after that, for more reasons than stayed here, but we haven't really talked since then (I'm hoping to soon) and I'm still kinda pissed.
Never mind we're on a different continent.
Never mind we have roots and history that go well past the time when Spain colonized us.
Never mind we've been colonized by countries other than Spain that have altered our nation's history and culture.
Never mind we don't speak Spanish in the Philippines as a primary language, definitely not as our national language.
Never mind I've personally struggled with my Pilipino-American identity before UCLA and afterwards still.
Don't get me wrong: I'm not insulted by the idea that we're like Mexicans. I have learned that we do have things in common with them for sure, and things that are different. I have nothing against Mexicans.
It's just that...his statement is moot, and makes light of all the ways that the Pilipino culture is one of its own. It hit me right in the gut. I'm still pissed just thinking about it.
I just wanted to know how you all feel about that, especially seeing as how I'm so detached from the world of Cali, where we Pilipinos/Filipinos/Fil-Ams are pretty much everywhere.
That's all for now.
My PTSP stats include:
-Co-Founder AKA Mom of PTSP Bayanihan with JP
-PTSP Bayanihan's first official Director (and all the titles before Director)
-One of two of the first Alumni Advisors to PTSP (at least as far as I know)
-Co-author of the PTSP Bayanihan handbook (which I've still never seen the final version of, but -I bet probably needs some major revising), again with JP
All this is not to mention my many hats in Pilipino organizations and clubs and whatnot during my 2.5 years at UCLA, being that I am a transfer student. I graduated in 2005 to find myself pretty much unemployed, in debt, back at home, bored with life, car-less, newly-single--so pretty much in a terrible, terrible rut. Maybe this wasn't the best idea, but I thought med school (and more financial aid) would solve all these problems in one fantastic hit. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen...and I'm in my 3rd year, currently residing in Guadalajara, Mexico, to boot.
So I'm supposed to be studying, but I'll leave you with this story and question, and feel free to comment on this.
This weekend, I went to 2 super bowl parties. The first one, during the first half of the game, had tons of traditional football party food, drinks, yelling, and I was the only non-Mexican girl to boot, not to mention that there were only 5 girls there total. It was nice to be the only girl there that understood Futbol Americano as well. Anyway, that was one party. I went to another in the second half that was quite the opposite. It was quieter, less drinking, fast food, people studying in the other rooms, and I was literally the only person jumping around during plays and screaming at the TV. Perhaps one would think it was the 2 beers and tequila shot at the other party getting to me...but no. If you know me at all, you'll know that I'm like that during sports events as long as I feel I'm with people I'm comfortable with. After the game ended, we were just sitting around, sipping on beer and talking as people started to leave. About 2 more beers in, I couldn't drive anywhere just yet and stuck around.
Conversation went around...we were all joking around and such, when, to make a long story short, one of my friends started talking about race. I threw in my usual quip about myself: in Mexico, before I can say a word of my awful Spanish which completely lacks an accent, most people look at me and I am almost certain they think one of the following:
-She's Mexican.
-She's Asian...I think.
-I have no idea where this girl is from.
I swear most people think the third of the above the most often, as people constantly ask me where I'm from, especially after I talk. Usually I say California, but sometimes people ask for a more...in-depth answer. And some of those people have no idea where the Philippines is anyway, so I've just learned to let this go. This all is no longer weird to me, and that's where the story turns ugly.
You tell me--how would you respond to this statement:
Pilipinos are the Mexicans of Asian. Your last names are all Spanish like the Mexicans.
Perhaps fueled by the alcohol, I was pissed. My friend tried to play it off like we were all making fun of each other, that I was being too emotional in response to this, and that is was just 'cause I was drinking (by the way, I wasn't drunk either). He and my other friend walked off for a bit, and I stayed lying on the couch, trying not to explode. I left shortly after that, for more reasons than stayed here, but we haven't really talked since then (I'm hoping to soon) and I'm still kinda pissed.
Never mind we're on a different continent.
Never mind we have roots and history that go well past the time when Spain colonized us.
Never mind we've been colonized by countries other than Spain that have altered our nation's history and culture.
Never mind we don't speak Spanish in the Philippines as a primary language, definitely not as our national language.
Never mind I've personally struggled with my Pilipino-American identity before UCLA and afterwards still.
Don't get me wrong: I'm not insulted by the idea that we're like Mexicans. I have learned that we do have things in common with them for sure, and things that are different. I have nothing against Mexicans.
It's just that...his statement is moot, and makes light of all the ways that the Pilipino culture is one of its own. It hit me right in the gut. I'm still pissed just thinking about it.
I just wanted to know how you all feel about that, especially seeing as how I'm so detached from the world of Cali, where we Pilipinos/Filipinos/Fil-Ams are pretty much everywhere.
That's all for now.
Sunday
En Fotografias: Traveling Thru My First Job
Few months out of college, I got quite a few boos and nos left and right from potential employers. I did have this very odd and awkward hang-up with this boys home who'd offered me a job as a youth counselor, but told me that they lost my fingerprints so that pissed away 2 months of my time. It was just clank city as far as job-landing was concerned.
Keep in mind that I applied almost exclusively to nonprofit organizations cause I'm apparently not interested in making any kind of money and sort of had an impractical, natural aversion for corporate America, which is now officially ironic considering that my jobs to date have been centered on finding different ways of making money. And the different ways of making money often involve making nice with corporate America's various giving programs in support of my organization(s) and their work.
Give or take about 7 months of pondering my life goals, and thru strings of volunteering at various Los Angeles organizations, in February 2007, someone finally decided to say to me, why the hell not, come join us!
I felt a good vibe kick in when I kept emphasizing how much I loved writing, how I did that ish in my sleep, whether I was arguing on a basketball message board or whether a 66-page Academic Year Proposal for Bayanihan.
So...I worked as a Resource Development Specialist in support of LA County's Public Housing programs.
Basically I was someone who wrote proposals to people with money and did some other marketing stuff. A type of salesman who writes stuff to people with money. One of my cousins called that "intellectual/white-collar hustling."
Implicit in that job description was a whole lot of researching and pattern-finding while at a desk for 8 hours straight in a typical office building structure thing. I would call people, interview them, and occasionally travel to different sites. This was all quite alright for me, I did the best I could with it.
What really made the job however was becoming acquainted with the different subcultures and populations: the "work" subculture packed with office politics and gossip, the East Los subculture, the Long Beach subculture, the public housing population, the volunteer population.
This was in August during USC's first week of school hanging out at one of the housing sites. What USC does is have this kind of volunteer week where people sign up to volunteer at a place in the community. Was kinda alright, lot of kiddie kid 1st years though.
When you work in nonprofit development, you do a lot of schmoozing and networking. It's part of the work, which is relatively alright, especially after spending all your time up to the event making signs, setting up stuff, and cold calling lots of people.
The funnest Thanksgiving celebration ever. We had a Souljah Boy Contest at one of the sites.
I always gave her a smile when she peeked into the lunch room. I didn't know she had a lot to say about immigrants. Sorry, but I was hella disappointed when I learned that she already had a kid and a husband.
Three Mexican ladies that ate with me almost every other lunch, and took me out to a place during my last week. They're Mexican so they knew Mexican and gave me Mexican.
Other people threw me a party, sort of, like these Asian women here! Actually, there was some kind of baby shower or something as the cause of celebration.
The place was pretty much female-dominated. Women of color, too. Something they made mention of at orientation. I was the only guy who worked in my department at the office, which might've made the dynamic a little weird at times, but I was just content to be there and listen to whatever they said.
Keep in mind that I applied almost exclusively to nonprofit organizations cause I'm apparently not interested in making any kind of money and sort of had an impractical, natural aversion for corporate America, which is now officially ironic considering that my jobs to date have been centered on finding different ways of making money. And the different ways of making money often involve making nice with corporate America's various giving programs in support of my organization(s) and their work.
Give or take about 7 months of pondering my life goals, and thru strings of volunteering at various Los Angeles organizations, in February 2007, someone finally decided to say to me, why the hell not, come join us!
I felt a good vibe kick in when I kept emphasizing how much I loved writing, how I did that ish in my sleep, whether I was arguing on a basketball message board or whether a 66-page Academic Year Proposal for Bayanihan.
So...I worked as a Resource Development Specialist in support of LA County's Public Housing programs.
Basically I was someone who wrote proposals to people with money and did some other marketing stuff. A type of salesman who writes stuff to people with money. One of my cousins called that "intellectual/white-collar hustling."
Implicit in that job description was a whole lot of researching and pattern-finding while at a desk for 8 hours straight in a typical office building structure thing. I would call people, interview them, and occasionally travel to different sites. This was all quite alright for me, I did the best I could with it.
What really made the job however was becoming acquainted with the different subcultures and populations: the "work" subculture packed with office politics and gossip, the East Los subculture, the Long Beach subculture, the public housing population, the volunteer population.
This was in August during USC's first week of school hanging out at one of the housing sites. What USC does is have this kind of volunteer week where people sign up to volunteer at a place in the community. Was kinda alright, lot of kiddie kid 1st years though.
When you work in nonprofit development, you do a lot of schmoozing and networking. It's part of the work, which is relatively alright, especially after spending all your time up to the event making signs, setting up stuff, and cold calling lots of people.
The funnest Thanksgiving celebration ever. We had a Souljah Boy Contest at one of the sites.
I always gave her a smile when she peeked into the lunch room. I didn't know she had a lot to say about immigrants. Sorry, but I was hella disappointed when I learned that she already had a kid and a husband.
Three Mexican ladies that ate with me almost every other lunch, and took me out to a place during my last week. They're Mexican so they knew Mexican and gave me Mexican.
Other people threw me a party, sort of, like these Asian women here! Actually, there was some kind of baby shower or something as the cause of celebration.
The place was pretty much female-dominated. Women of color, too. Something they made mention of at orientation. I was the only guy who worked in my department at the office, which might've made the dynamic a little weird at times, but I was just content to be there and listen to whatever they said.
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